From an almost to be love quarrel or misunderstanding between lovers, we both managed to deescalate it and it somewhat lead to a few minute talk of life, mainly being happy or happiness.
I’ve realized it for so long, when I say I’m happy or when I tell someone that I feel happy, a deep question rises inside: are you really happy?
I knew that I am unsure on how I would really answer it.
When we are young, when we feel happy, we really feel and see it, even our surroundings do.
But, the moment you hit adulthood or when you mature, things may not be the same.
There are times that…
I feel happy but my actions show nothing;
I feel nothing but my actions show it; or
I feel happy but my actions show it.
But all I know is that…
I am really happy, I appreciate whatever or whoever the cause be.
Sometimes I get jealous with people who’s in the same age or with few gaps when they feel happy, they don’t feel it, they really feel and show it and you can see it. Randomly, I get the urge to ask them but I’d rather refrain from asking.
When you grow mature, sometimes we tend not to be showy anymore, we rather show our professional side as we tend to worry about other’s opinion or its just a mannerism while some will stay the same, just because that’s them and we have no right to judge one from its cover.
Worse case scenario is that we could be mistaken as we don’t care or appreciate one thing when we don’t show emotions especially a smile or sign of happiness when someone gave effort in giving that thing or their presence.
However, I tend to act like a 8 year old when I see cats, I just really love them.
Maybe happiness has different approach to everyone at a time, sometimes we show it or not; we feel it or not; whichever goes, one thing that we know in our minds is that we are happy and we appreciate it.